I was driving behind a car today with a bumper sticker that read: Visualize World Peace. I hadn’t seen one of those in a while, but it immediately made me think of my favorite bumper sticker - the Bumper Sticker of Bumper Stickers: Visualize Whorled Peas.

For real.

Ooooooh…. Just learned from FooFighters.com that the band may be releasing my favorite song off “There is Nothing Left to Lose.” Aaaah!!! The song is “Aurora.” It’s probably the second most frequently quoted song on this site (next to February Stars, of course). And it is utterly fantastic.

But I digress.

I am currently in a much better mood than I was this morning - which isn’t really saying much. This morning I would have very happily picked up one of Max’s guitars and wreaked mass destruction on everything in the loft within swinging distance. As it was, I had to settle with violently slamming doors and fantasizing about the violence.

What was it, exactly, that set me off? It just felt very much like, “when it rains, it pours.” And I think reaction from the past few weeks is finally getting through all my defenses. When I spoke to Max this morning, I was lucky to choke out a few sentences and get him off the phone without ripping him to shreds. I have a severely sharp tongue and know how to use it when I’m angry. Max throws water bottles at the wall - I shred people with words. I think I’d rather be able to throw water bottles and smash guitars.

But I digress yet again.

Today’s topic: My current hypothesis, after three years of intensive and personal research, is this: Men are pigs by nature. And their girlfriends are generally just hopelessly stupid.

It is very difficult for me to have much respect for my own gender anymore. I mean, I know how I act. Give me a break - I’m on the whiny, needy side of the spectrum. But, specifically - today - I’m speaking of the women with boyfriends. Those women who live a blissfully naive life believing that all is well in paradise. All the while you see the boyfriend quietly, unobtrusively sniffing around like a dog in heat.

The women I have completely and utterly lost all respect for are those with boyfriends who have cheated on them. No, no, I know! It happens. And you forgive him, you really do. Once. Once, do you hear? When it happens again, you STOP AND THINK. Perhaps there is a problem here. Hmm…

But my very, very favorite reaction is when the boyfriend gets caught, and is released from all responsibility. Instead, the “other woman” becomes the object of hatred and loathing. Um… hello? Last I checked, it takes two to tango, even in this day and age. Yet most women are so lacking in self-esteem and self-respect and self-confidence, and so desperate to keep their man at all costs, that they will turn all their anger on the female and forgive the male his trespasses.

As someone who has been on both ends of the issue, I have some thoughts. First, woman - wake up! I’m just sure he won’t do it again (*sneering*)… As Max once said so eloquently, men think with their penises. If he has so little conscience that he’s done it before (more than once!), chances are you’re in big trouble in the long run. Yes, he can change. But, good luck.

Next thought - when you deny the responsibility of your boyfriend in the little side thing, and completely blame that BITCH, you are only hurting yourself. Now, I’m not saying don’t blame the BITCH, because chances are she knew all about you and really didn’t care. But, for the love of Pete, HE was there too!

*smacking forehead*

I have become very cynical toward the thought of men remaining monogomous and faithful. Not because so many have cheated on me, (really, they just haven’t), but because I’ve seen the ones who do cheat. The road to hell is paved with good intentions, but it’s the libido that wins every time. And there ain’t no changin’ them. So… I suppose women need to determine if that behavior is something they can live with. If so, then GREAT! Go for it! If not, then use the brain God gave you, and quit thinking with your lack of self-confidence.

Speculation will run rampant, I’m sure, regarding my current hypothesis. I am speaking of no one situation in particular. Just of repeating patterns that I’m trying to deal with in my life, which created this hypothesis. Generally I need to write things down to get them out of my system. This case is no different. I’m not really interested in being this angry for the rest of time.

“Spare me confession

It’s confession you sell…”

Visualizing peas instead of destruction,

michelle