First of all, big-ass kudos to my brother David, who installed a CD burner and new massive 40gb HD in my PC this weekend. (And yes, 40gb is massive when you’re used to juggling things on a 4gb drive!) Thank you little bro’!

Now - to the other stuff.

Lack of sleep will be the death of me.

Mike stayed at my house last night until 1am. We were chatting, in such an easy way. He sat with my guitar in his hands, and we flipped through my photo albums and I told him stories about … my life.

It was cool to see so many people I’d nearly forgotten about. So many times I wish I’d forgotten about. To lay it out so Mike could see it was kinda cool. Weird. I wish he’d been there all along.

Tonight he was supposed to call me when he got home from his friend Lauren’s. And he did - around midnight. At the time, I was sound asleep. And we talked til 1:30am.

It’s been a long time since I’d been willing to give up so much sleep just to talk to someone. Except, this time, it feels less like teenaged-angsty-save-me crap. Either way, it’s got to stop. It’s killing me.

Don’t get me wrong. I still giggle on the phone with Michael and wish he was laying in bed next to me instead. I still hate to end the conversation and we still sound like sixteen-year-olds when we hang up. It’s just that he isn’t oxygen to me. I can hang up the phone secure in the knowledge that he’s thinking of me like I’m thinking of him, and I’ll talk to him again soon. There’s no question.

He’s as safe as he is dangerous. It’s a bizarre combination. But I’ll take it.

Appreciating it all,

michelle