“I just can’t understand it. He doesn’t sit still in my class, he watches the clock, and sometimes I think he’d just sit in his chair and stare off into space if I didn’t prompt him to work. Sometimes he talks to himself or makes little noises or hums. It takes him a long time to complete tasks - so long that sometimes I give up altogether. Can you help me with this?”

This is what I get from Justin’s reading teacher last night, during parent-teacher conferences.

Dan and I just sat there. I blinked for a minute, and then realized they were all waiting for me to speak. Due to the shortness of time, the tirade that was begging for escape was held back, and honest insued instead.

He hates reading, I told her. He’d rather die than read. And you have to prompt him. He needs extra time for assignments.

I just stopped. This was ridiculous.

I walked out of the classroom with Dan, and just looked at him. “How do you feel about that,” I asked. His response was exactly what I was thinking: It’s pretty obvious no one has read his IEP.

A special-needs student’s IEP (Individualized Instructional Plan) should be the cornerstone for all instruction. A team of teachers, staff and the student’s parents all labor over it for hours. It contains listings of strengths, weaknesses, educational goals, but most importantly - strategies. HOW to get him to the place he can best learn and understand.

His classroom teacher asked me a month ago if we’d thought about putting Justin on medication. If she was as versed on Asperger’s as she’s assured me, she’d know that medication (i.e. Ritalin, Adderall) can exacerbate Asperger’s, or have generally no effect whatsoever. It’s not helpful.

I have asked repeatedly for team meetings, and I’ve been brushed off. Last year, they held team meetings once a month. This year, everything’s fine, says the classroom teacher, we don’t need that.

However, I see Justin being stressed out about school - and hating it.

I expressed my concerns to his principal last night. He seemed more interested than anyone else had been - but this may be because of the Federal guidelines regulating IEPs more than anything else. Truly, though, I don’t care about the motivation. Just get these teachers to understand that they don’t understand Justin. That would be half the battle right there.

I went on a mini-rampage last night at work, then, and printed all the articles I could find by experts like Tony Attwood and Temple Grandin. The articles were focused on the teaching side of raising a child with Asperger’s. What should the teachers expect, what should they not. What is reasonable. That’s what I wanted.

On Monday, I’m going to present them all with large packets of reading material. I’ll have highlighted all the pertinent items. I’ll also make copies of the IEP for the teachers, and highlight that as well.

I can’t take chances with Justin’s education. I know this is just the beginning of a long and arduous thirteen years. Second grade is not going to be the one that trips us up.

I never said anything about the Walk for Asperger’s. The St. Louis inaugural walk went really well. The number of people who showed up was three times what they expected. My dad actually got into it, and promised that next year we’ll have shirts made up for Team Justin. We raised a total of $150 amongst ourselves for the National Alliance of Autism Research, and next year we expect to raise much more.

There were firetrucks and police cars and we got to play with them. One of the firemen put their hat on my head and gave me a big metal crowbar-looking thingy and my mom took a picture. (I’m a Third Watch groupie.) But beyond all that, it was a good feeling to see all these parents and families and friends who have also had to change their way of thinking and living to adjust to autism and Asperger’s Syndrome. It made me feel like I wasn’t alone.

The fight to raise awareness of Asperger’s Syndrome in the midwest is just beginning. I hope to make a significant contribution to that effort. I just need to know where to begin.

Moving,

michelle