I always start my period when I buy a pregnancy test. This is an incontrovertible fact of life. My life, at least.

Just when I’m worried enough to be distracted from normal activities, I break down and buy a test. And generally, several hours later, I start.

Monday was no different. Am I? Am I? Am I? No! For heaven’s sake, get that out of your head, Michelle. Quit worrying about it, thinking about it, and just go buy a test and get it over with!

Fine! Instead of turning right to go to the office, I continued straight and headed for Target. It was a 20-minute diversion, but worth it if I could get my concentration back.

After all, my breasts had been hurting for much longer than they should have been. It’ll be nice to get this period started!

The usual suspects lined the aisles of Target. Moms with grumpy toddlers, old ladies with nothing better to do. And me, striding purposely toward an aisle that purported to give me some relief.

I nearly passed up the aisle with the Zone bars in it. Might as well grab a box of vanilla chocolate, since I’ll be starting my period soon. Ah, chocolate.

The Target brand stuck out as the cheapest by a longshot. Why blow good money on something that I don’t need? The Target brand was the winner.

Back to the office with my bars and tests. Strangely enough, I didn’t even need to pee. Very strange for someone who’d been getting out of bed four times a night lately to do just that.

Lunchtime, finally. I’ll just pop into the bathroom to get this over with, and then grab some lunch somewhere.

I’m sorry, wait. What does it mean if there are two lines? The box says, okay, wait. Two lines, pregnant. No. Wait. Two lines, not? No. Definitely, two lines, pregnant.

I’ll just shake this little tester thingy up and see if it decides to go back to normal. Shake, shake. No change.

Heh. I’ll get my period soon. May 2005 is soon, right? (I guess May 2005. Or however long it takes to get your period again after you HAVE A BABY! ::squee::)

Big news,
michelle