Can I Keep It?

I don't know what to do with myself, I'm so excited. I'm actually writing an entry.

I have the most amazing feeling of contentedness right now. I'll attribute a bunch of it to the fact that Javier Mendoza Band's site is finished. Well, mostly. At least the damned thing is live and I don't have to think about it again until after the CD Release Concert. Which, by the way, if you are in St. Louis, you should attend.

Another part of the contentedness comes from a feeling of a job well done. My job. I have six - count 'em, six! - appointments set up for tomorrow. I had an appointment tonight for over $200k. I have another appointment on Friday midday for another $100k, and then I get to pat myself on the back and drive down to Rolla. Yay!

I just love my job. There is nothing like feeling like you've done the best you can for someone and will help them retire or send their kids to college or help them have enough money to buy their dream house. Maybe I'm just happy because the market (fickle bitch) has been treating me right. Maybe it's that I can look into the face of my clients and tell them they are actually making money. Who knows? Who cares? All I know is that I don't hate going into work anymore. Thank God.

Tonight I played Totally Single Girl and stopped at IHOP on the way home. I ate dinner in relative peace and quiet while reading Marian Keyes' new book. There's nothing better than that. It's been over two months since I spent any quality time with myself. I had a feeling it would be weird to share my time with Someone Special, but I definitely didn't think I'd be sad to give up all those long Friday and Saturday nights spent with my laptop at Borders. Strangely enough, though, I do.

There has to be some way I can find a balance between Time with the Boy and Time Alone. I think the thing that sucks is that The Boy is so far away right now, and we only get to see each other on the weekends. So. It's not that I don't love him dearly, but sometimes I just need time to myself.

I feel a bubble bath coming on.

Javier's site is done. Waahoo! I can't get over it.

I'm feeling content because I'm finally shaking a nasty head/chest cold. My head has been wrapped in proverbial gauze for several days, and I hate not feeling my best. I especially hate feeling my worst. But this is the best day of the week so far, and I'm enjoying it.

It's so amazing to feel this calm. I know it's not my environment - the two-foot-tall stack of papers and magazines at my feet will attest to that. I haven't vacuumed, I haven't dusted. I haven't put anything away from my monster-sized shopping trip to Stephen's mom's knick-knack shop. But I don't really care. The only thing that could make it better would be if it were 2p and early-April, where I could take a book out on the deck and read it while enjoying the warm sunshine and blue skies.

Instead, I think I hear a bubble bath calling my name...

Slothfully,
michelle

Posted by Michelle at March 3, 2004 10:36 PM | TrackBack